Sarcastic Quotes, Sayings about Sarcasm

History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all other alternatives – Abba Eban.

He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know – Abraham Lincoln.

I am convinced that God does not play dice – Albert Einstein.

Calamities are of two kinds: misfortunes to ourselves, and good fortune to others – Ambrose Bierce.

Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence – Ashleigh Brilliant.

Colombian humor is very black, very sarcastic – Barbet Schroeder.

If you are first you are first. If you are second you are nothing – Bill Shankly.

He has Van Gogh’s ear for music – Billy Wilder.

Why do we laugh at such terrible things? Because comedy is often the sarcastic realization of inescapable tragedy – Bryant H. McGill.

It is not necessary to understand things in order to argue about them – Caron de Beaumarchais.

I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure – Clarence Darrow.

My mom was sarcastic about men. She would tell me Adam was the rough draft and Eve was the final product. She was a feminist minister, an earth mom who wore a bra only on Sundays – Daphne Zuniga.

Itâ€™s not an inside joke if the voices in your head and you only understand it – Eli.

I got into therapy in the fifth grade because I said in a sarcastic way that I was going to kill myself, and they didn’t get it then. Nothing’s changed – Fiona Apple.

He loves nature in spite of what it did to him – Forrest Tucker.

The United States is a nation of laws: badly written and randomly enforced – Frank Zappa.

The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech – George Bernard Shaw.

When ideas fail, words come in very handy – Goethe.

A narcissist is someone better looking than you are – Gore Vidal.

I didnâ€™t like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions – the curtain was up – Groucho Marx.

He is a self-made man and worships his creator – Irvin S. Cobb.

A good listener is usually thinking about something else – Kin Hubbard.

You have delighted us long enough – Jane Austen.

There is nothing funny about Halloween. This sarcastic festival reflects, rather, an infernal demand for revenge by children on the adult world – Jean Baudrillard.

He has such a patronizing tone and manner, and such a sarcastic sense of humor. I found him rather brutal, a kind of elegant brutality which appealed. No, I think he came pretty much off the page – Jeremy Northam.

I’m good at being sarcastic with guys. They don’t want the quiet, prissy little things – Jessica Alba.

Music is the only language in which you cannot say a mean or sarcastic thing – John Erskine.

Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas – Johnny Carson.

A sarcastic person has a superiority complex that can be cured only by the honesty of humility – Lawrence G. Lovasik.

I didnâ€™t attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it – Mark Twain.

The trouble with a kitten is that it eventually becomes a cat – Ogden Nash.

Every time I look at you I get a fierce desire to be lonesome – Oscar Levant.

He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends – Oscar Wilde.

Itâ€™s always darkest before it turns absolutely pitch black – Paul Newman.

My father was a very unhappy person, very sarcastic, and my mother was very nervous and worried about what people thought. They weren’t monsters, but it wasn’t a good childhood – Paula Danziger.

I feel so miserable without you, itâ€™s almost like having you here – Stephen Bishop.

He was happily married – but his wife wasnâ€™t – Victor Borge.

We didn’t lose the game; we just ran out of time – Vince Lombardi.

A modest little person, with much to be modest about – Winston Churchill.

Quotes And Sayings